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  • Writer's pictureKristina Atkins

Health Warning

WRITER’S SYNDROME is a dangerous and addicting condition that, if unchecked, can take over your life. It has led many once-healthy people into a land of dreams, imaginary people, and very few real people. The symptoms include:

  1. Vomiting – specifically, word vomiting; usually on paper or a computer screen; also occurs verbally whenever one is asked about their latest work-in-progress

  2. Obsessing – an inability to think about anything other than the work-in-progress, scenes, characters, plot twists, etc.

  3. Anti-Social Behavior – when given the choice between writing alone or interacting with other people, one consistently chooses the former; after time, one becomes more familiar and comfortable with their characters (also known as imaginary friends) then with actual friends, family, spouse, etc.

  4. Insomnia – inability to sleep due to obsessive thoughts or act of writing (see also Caffeine Dependence)

  5. Racing thoughts – a sudden barrage of thoughts; described by those afflicted as “inspiration”

  6. Hypochondria – belief that one is suffering from an illness known as “Writer’s Block”

  7. Emotional Instability – sudden mood swings; from highs (one receives positive feedback, has a “good day” of writing, etc.) to lows (one cannot find the “right words”, receives negative feedback, gives harsh criticism to themselves)

  8. Weight Gain or Loss – varies from person to person; when absorbed in the action of writing, some patients neglect to eat any food at all; others munch without cessation

  9. Caffeine Dependence – initially to combat an attack of insomnia the night before; after time, compounds so one cannot function without their cup of coffee, soda, or tea

  10. Uncontrollable rage – typically triggered by a harsh critique

  11. Irritability – manifested in sharp words, angry glares, and bared teeth; usually triggered when one’s writing is interrupted by an outside factor (see also Anti-Social Behavior)

If you believe you or someone you love suffers from this condition, please seek help immediately.

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